Learn How to Trust Yourself
If you want to know how I keep showing up day in and day out it’s because I trust me. I know me. I love me. I want whats best for me. I proactively make decisions and take action based on my needs and wants.
Cool, Marsh. We're happy for you. You got the perfect life. Thanks for the reminder. Ok dollface: pump the brakes. Contrary to popular belief I'm not made of stone. I share what and when I want and then the rest of life is: well, life.
And when I'm down in the dumps there are some extremely influential people in my life that see me in a way I can’t always see myself. Which is awesome and very helpful.
But it always returns to me. And the ability for me to "know me" and stand strong in my convictions is something that will allow me to continue to show up without external influences should they be unavailable.
I was born into a family with 2 older sisters and 1 baby sister that followed a few years after me. The 4 of us are as different as night and day but we also have some beliefs and morals that we all share.
One of those beliefs is that every.single.woman. has in her the ability to be ANYTHING she wants to be, despite what she’s seen or sees.
Our parents raised us to believe that.
My dad surrounded by all of us females never doubted our potential for greatness (despite sticking his foot in his mouth a few times 🤣 ... I get that from him). That regardless of what happened to us (or what happens to us) we are the ones that control our destiny.
From that upbringing ours cups did runneth over and we were able to spill that belief onto everyone we encountered. Me through my society, my oldest sister and youngest sister from crushing it in male predominant fields and my ride or die middle sis through her current work with encouraging brand new mama's as a night nanny for infants.
My dad used to say that the only person in life you can depend on is yourself. That messed with me for years until I finally got it.
I thought he meant to trust no one (which has stuck lol). What I interpret his lessons as now is to trust me (I did all the things on that: bold, italics, and underline so you can feel it).
I do now. I trust myself and my capabilities. I have the confidence now that I can and will take care of me to the best of my ability at any given time. It wasn't always like that. But I got in there and started doing the work.
And I want to share a bit of knowledge of learning to trust yourself with other women.
One way is to come up with a nickname for yourself. I call myself Marsh or Marcian depending on the situation. “Come on Marsh you got this!” “Marcian you are out of this world!” A nickname you can say to yourself to get a giggle. Or to encourage yourself. Be your own cheerleader. No one needs to know! Meaning if it feels a little awkward at first, stick with it and know you don’t have to tell anyone about it. Life doesnt have to be so serious and robotic. "great job remembering to do laundry, Marsh!"...#winning
I also want you to identify what your non-negosh traits are and focus intently on them. Maybe you’re a vegetarian. Or you’re a sober. Or a fitness human that works out daily. Whatever it is, pick some of the parts of you that you identify with and think about specific situations that have further helped you to identify with that.
I was at a dinner once with family style platters and grabbed pasta from the vegetarian platter. I bit into a piece of chicken and just knew. The consistency, the texture, the taste. Inner Marsh was all "I don't eat chicken, I'm a vegetarian". From age 14 to now it has been a conscious decision and something that I'm proud of. Because it's my truth. I didn't want to eat flesh so I convinced Elaine to let me stop and she finally did at that age. Day in and day out I choose something that feels in alignment with me.
Now it's your turn. What's something you do or dont do that you have the opportunity to do or not do? Be proud of yourself. You decided. And then decided again and again. Even if it's been a day, a month or a year, you are doing great. Recognize your active role in being who it is you want to be and bask in all the glory that is you. You got this!
See you next week! Until then, keep connecting the dots!
If you want to discuss anything relating to your personal or professional growth you can set up a free fifteen minute phone call with me here. We’ll discuss how to get back to making YOU your top priority.